People existing in society in good faith. People who just want the world to be a better place to live, and aren't willing to shove people down below them in order to get an edge.
The sad reality is that I'm going to be fine. I'm going to survive the turmoil and probably make money in the process, because I've been lucky before now. I worry for people that haven't been lucky. I worry for people that have been lucky but happen to be the "wrong" race. I worry for my gay friends that are looking at fleeing the country as an easier alternative. I worry for my trans friend that *already has* fled the country.
The US has always had problems, sure, but nothing like this.
I think people are misunderstanding your comment. There’s a saying “look in the mirror” which is used negatively when someone isn’t being self-aware. People are most likely taking your comment as a play of this idiom and it sounds like you are yelling at someone to be self reflective. It’s miscommunication
I dunno I guess every time I use them? Especially during work outs. There isn’t a single thing on me I would be willing to give up or consider “minor.” Unless it’s like eye or hair color. But to lose a finger or toe or a whole leg or both because I don’t spend 8h of my day contemplating their value to me is just not how I roll. Friendo.
There was a solid 18 months where I woke up to a kitty cuddled in my arms and no alarm, no kids, no SO. Just work at some time in a few hours and a purring kitty.
I miss it. Even though I could see my breath in my own bedroom.
It is minor. People that are neurotypical don't even think about it and take it for granted. For them it is normal, so it's not a big deal, they don't think there's a struggle there because they don't struggle.
I'm a shut-in and I'll say it doesn't help living in a sparse area with only a bike*. I usually just ride on the trail to a very close bridge, sometimes I go to the closest town over and buy a few things from the produce section from the local grocery store and that's it.
Admittedly, I probably still wouldn't be very social in a denser place (money, but also other issues).
* I don't *want* to drive, though lots of ditches around here and there is no north/south trail. So it is a factor.
No allergies. Im allergic to dairy, eggs and most nuts. I'm not lactose *intolerant*, which I wish I had, because then I could be in the bathroom for a few hours instead of a hospital for a few days. So many things have milk in them, and the few things that don't put eggs in them too. I can't eat out.
I feel you. I'm allergy to all nuts (that are tested for) and soy. Dairy, eggs and nuts sounds like a shitty combination because a lot of the vegan stuff is nut-based.
My husband is like you, and also wishes for the absolute silence of my mind. But you’re right about green grass - I wish I could visualize happy memories or even picture the people I love.
Being able to eat gluten. So many things have wheat and thus gluten. Soy sauce? Check. Dumpling wrappers basically everywhere in Japan? Check (more flexible and easier to work that pure rice flour). Tons of sauces? Check. Salad dressings? Check (sometimes via soy sauce in Japan).
An interest in dogs. I really dislike them as far as having to live with one which makes dating literally impossible. Using dating sites over the years I've seen probably 80%+ profiles mention loving dogs, needing dogs, stealing your dog, owning all the dogs, some profiles even *start* with "blah blah dog."
I hate that there's such an obsession with dogs and travel... :(
Oh, you will have no problem finding an amazing person at some point in time then. Cats are better anyway ;)
Me and my GF met online and we're both crazy cat people (our sons are two beautiful furry brothers). Just show that you're a cat person instead! Hope you find what you're looking for.
I understand this well. Spent a few decades in dysfunctional relationships rooted in my lack of sexual desire. Happily married to another ace woman today, where sex is only ever suggested as part of joke and we've never even came close. She is liberating, freeing, incredible and safe.
Yet I still hold a lot of guilt from previous partners who spent time thinking something was wrong with them or I was cheating because I always made "not tonight" excuses for several years straight. It wasn't fair to either of us, but my lack of introspection, self-honesty and fear of being alone kept us years of strife.
Things are wonderful now, no complaints but *GAWD* a lot of heart ache could've been avoided if I had a *normal" sex drive.
While we don't make a habit of it, both of us walk in front of the other when getting out of the shower or getting dressed for the day. It's just a part of life, nothing sexual about it. We've also given various small compliments about each other, generally after one of us gets a tattoo, but we have both discussed than anything about each other genitals is just weird and unwanted. We really are the greatest for each other. 😂
Having said that, she asked me to post a picture of her breasts a lil while ago, in my post history, but that's the most sexual thing either of us have suggested. And it was just taking a few photos than a movie, not like past GFs that wanted to turn that in to sex.
Now I'm curious myself, is nudity a hurdle for you? Fully valid and no judgement, just wondering. :)
Thanks for your story. I find it very interesting!
This is just something I wondered about, whether it would be aversion or just a disinterest. I don't know many ace/aro people that well to ask.
No, I am neither and am in a relationship that involves it all. We are very comfortable with each other haha.
I'm ace in a demi relationship, but I'm NGL, it's still hard. I'm suuuuper glad sex isn't the focus of our relationship and we've been going strong for a while, but it does also add complexity
I'm aro/ace and sometimes I feel like this. But I guess what I want is just another person to have a connection with. If more people were aro/ace my problem would also be solved. Still I do sometimes wonder what I'm missing out on. Everyone seems to like it, yet I find it yucky. There's plenty of other things in life to enjoy though, so no biggie
In my case, I just feel like it’s unfair to my girlfriend. I know it’s not my fault, and I’m not obligated to give her something I don’t enjoy myself - but the reality is that something that’s a big part of most relationships is missing from ours, and it’s because of me. We’re in an open relationship, so she doesn’t have to go entirely without, but it’s still not ideal.
Hmmm yeah that sucks. In that regard we aro/aces have it easier I guess. For most people romance and sexuality seem to be tied. I can imagine that it often can lead to incompatibility
Try eating cereal with Fairlife instead. Tastes almost the same as milk with no side effects. I didn't know how much I missed cereal in milk until I had it
I was at a wedding tonight and everyone on the dance floor seemed to know what to do with their hands while dancing. I just can't seem to figure it out.
Two things, I have horrible vision, wear -9 glasses.
And I am autistic and have a very difficult time navigating many social interactions, I would love to not have to deal with either of these.
That's very impressive! We had a swing dance club in my high school and they always looked like they were having a good time. I think the closest thing I've done to dancing is marching in formation in the Army, which does take rhythm and coordination. But there's a certain "fluidness" to some people that my body just doesn't have.
I was terrible at swing! I can't lead in dancing. I can run a bunch of troopies to set up some comms in the bush and no one will ever hear me as us kids were raised "dad works night shifts so be quiet" kind of quiet. But if a game plan while dancing is a learned skill, I never hit proficiency at it and I think it's just not for me.
Well done, you. You learned a skill I can only envy, and in under a year!
I'm here with you. I've spent the last two years no contact with mine and undoing the damage they caused to me and my kid. The worst part is, they weren't always like this and I'll have to mourn the death of who they were long before I mourn the death of who they are.
I’ll have to mourn the death of who they were long before I mourn the death of who they are.
I've actually used almost this same exact phrase with one of my siblings who is also one of the "dependable ones". The versions of my mom and dad I loved the most are long dead already.
Move every finger except your index finger to your palm as close to your wrist as possible (in a comfortable manner)
Adjust your thumb so it is on the edge of your middle finger closer to your pinkie (this is to cause more friction between your middle finger and thumb)
Press down with your middle finger and then move your thumb, as quickly as possible, to around where your index finger is
If it works, it'll cause some burning on your finger and a loud noise, you can massage your palm where the middle finger hits if it's still muffled, it's likely stiff.
I definitely misread this and thought you said to put my index on my palm, so I was doing it that way, resting my thumb in my index finger. Definitely not as good as the actual method. Absolutely needs practice, though. Thanks for the help.
Which finger do you use other than your thumb? I use my rong finger, but I've seen others that use the middle. I'm sure some wierdo is out there mastering the pointer thumb technique
To illustrate how bad my singing is: our school did a musical every year. One year it was Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. The music department set up auditions. First they did a speaking audition, after which I was short-listed for Joseph. Then they did the singing audition. I ended up being 'one of the brothers, the one who doesn't really sing anything'.
I don't even want to be an awesome singer, just be able to carry a tune recognisably.
In my teens I wasn't able to carry a tune at all. Our music teacher marked me as "hopeless" after hearing a me singing a few lines.
This pissed me off royally. I had no desire or illusions of becoming a great singer, but I would not accept being "hopeless". So I started practicing with simple children's song melodies and recorded my singing with an old cassette recorder. It was indeed pretty awful at first, but I slowly got better. Then I got my driver's license and could sing along the songs from the radio and my cassettes while driving alone, it was a big step up from singing quietly in my room.
I also started playing the guitar to get a better understanding of musical theory, which was helpful. After I had learned the basics of playing rhythm guitar firmly I learned to play the piano. I believe that singing the melodies while playing them on the piano was essential to my development, since I could instantly hear if I did not hit the correct note.
By my mid-twenties I could already carry tunes easily and even got a complements about my singing voice. Key changes and modulations were still pretty challenging, but I kept on practising whenever I found the time.
Now in my forties I can repeat a melody correctly after hearing it once or twice and I consider myself a decent singer. I don't sing karaoke or any solo performances, but I do love singing backup or as part of a group.
If my music teacher hadn't embarrassed me publicly all those years ago, I most likely would have never put any effort in getting better at singing or learning to play instruments. I started this lifelong project purely out of spite, but it became a major and very dear part of my life. I even owe my marriage to music, while we were still dating my wife confessed to me that she most likely wouldn't have even noticed me if I hadn't been playing the guitar at that one summer party. Thankfully I wasn't too hammered at that time ;)
Hmm, perhaps this is the key. I sing a lot, in the car, or the shower, or when no-one is around, so I get practice in but I don't (can't) hear what I'm singing properly.
It would not hurt to try. Using your phone to record your singing may not be the best idea, the microphone is so small that singing even with normal volume gets the recording easily distorted.
USB-connected microphones are pretty cheap and will perform much better, just hook one to a laptop and use any simple recording software.
And I recommend starting small with children's songs. "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" with it's straightforward ascending and descending melody is a great starter, or at least for me it was.
Being an actual person where everything I do isn't too fancy, wannabe grown, picky, spoiled, or out of my league. I want to wear fun clothes and makeup without everyone gawking at *it* for trying too hard to look like a real person, or everyone angry that *it* has nice things it doesn't deserve. And probably the ability to enjoy music since I lost that after every single genre I enjoyed was either below society or trying too hard to be More Than.
Pleeeeeeaaasse. It's just one tiny little private jet and maybe one little tiny pilot to fly me. I hate traveling by air so much. What could be less minor? I think you should reconsider.
Almost worth it. I spent 20 hours getting home (Florida) from Canada, 36 hours getting home from Tennessee and 15 hours getting home from Colorado. I'm finding more and more that the airlines have little value-add and that doesn't even include the nightmare that is the TSA .
鴉PieFed
Omega
People existing in society in good faith. People who just want the world to be a better place to live, and aren't willing to shove people down below them in order to get an edge.
I hope you have a good weekend, my friend.
The sad reality is that I'm going to be fine. I'm going to survive the turmoil and probably make money in the process, because I've been lucky before now. I worry for people that haven't been lucky. I worry for people that have been lucky but happen to be the "wrong" race. I worry for my gay friends that are looking at fleeing the country as an easier alternative. I worry for my trans friend that *already has* fled the country.
The US has always had problems, sure, but nothing like this.
Oh look, a mirror
Sorry, should I be donating *more* than 20% of my paycheck to charity? Should I be volunteering for *more* than 12 hours/week?
What are *you* doing for your neighbors, you dumb cunt?
What the fuck?
I'm saying that your situation appears to be just like mine.
What crawled up your ass and died this evening?
I think people are misunderstanding your comment. There’s a saying “look in the mirror” which is used negatively when someone isn’t being self-aware. People are most likely taking your comment as a play of this idiom and it sounds like you are yelling at someone to be self reflective. It’s miscommunication
100% why I stopped engaging in activism.
You make a mistake and people always assume malice. It was too bad.
Nah, because it's communism /s
a functioning democracy
Hah, that's hard to come by for MOST people! I'm not even sure Norway is actually a democracy!
Deleted by author
I feel like long politians would also help out in other facets of life.
Normal vision.
My eye sight is so bad I can only see 15cm in front of me correctly, and I can't enlist in the army.
Mine is bad due to my genes, but not that bad. Sorry to hear it.
Hey, I can't enlist in the army! That's a good thing!
A very good thing, and one that's getting better with each election, truly.
Legs. I'm a double amputee, and I miss them.
I would say that’s not really minor
Relatively? Yeah. It's minor. Most people don't even consider having legs.
Yeah highly disagree there lol
When was the last time you thought: hmm.. I have legs. Outside of this post obviously
I dunno I guess every time I use them? Especially during work outs. There isn’t a single thing on me I would be willing to give up or consider “minor.” Unless it’s like eye or hair color. But to lose a finger or toe or a whole leg or both because I don’t spend 8h of my day contemplating their value to me is just not how I roll. Friendo.
Deleted by author
I feel like long legs would also help out in other facets of life.
Like, if you have long pants
You're a menace
Being alone.
Everyone’s talking about a loneliness epidemic and I’m here wishing I had fewer people around me.
Most of them I love, for sure, but the freedom and relaxation of not having anyone around is addicting and I haven’t had a good hit since 2020
You trade me some of your friends and I'll give you some of my alone time, dealio?
Not to brag, but god I love waking up to a clean, quiet, empty house with my dogs every day. I don't understand why people want a spouse or kids.
There was a solid 18 months where I woke up to a kitty cuddled in my arms and no alarm, no kids, no SO. Just work at some time in a few hours and a purring kitty.
I miss it. Even though I could see my breath in my own bedroom.
Peace is criminally underrated.
Me, neither. The peace and quiet is worth more than anything.
A brain that can produce a stable level of serotonin and not go haywire all because the seasons changed.\
That and being neurotypical, my life would be much easier if I didn't have ADHD
I feel you, although I'm not sure this counts as minor
It is minor. People that are neurotypical don't even think about it and take it for granted. For them it is normal, so it's not a big deal, they don't think there's a struggle there because they don't struggle.
A full set of functioning organs
Same here, I’ll take a fully functioning skeleton while we’re at it.
A loving family
My heart goes out to you, sweet stranger. ❤️
I'm so sorry, right there with ya
As in parents or spouse and kids?
I was gonna write the same thing. You're not alone on this one.
The thing that gets people to get out of the house and do things with other people.
Not like a vehicle, or transportation but the other thing
I'm a shut-in and I'll say it doesn't help living in a sparse area with only a bike*. I usually just ride on the trail to a very close bridge, sometimes I go to the closest town over and buy a few things from the produce section from the local grocery store and that's it.
Admittedly, I probably still wouldn't be very social in a denser place (money, but also other issues).
* I don't *want* to drive, though lots of ditches around here and there is no north/south trail. So it is a factor.
Oh I got one of those too i need the thing that gets me out of the house. Like a thing that makes me leave the house to go do
No allergies. Im allergic to dairy, eggs and most nuts. I'm not lactose *intolerant*, which I wish I had, because then I could be in the bathroom for a few hours instead of a hospital for a few days. So many things have milk in them, and the few things that don't put eggs in them too. I can't eat out.
I feel you. I'm allergy to all nuts (that are tested for) and soy. Dairy, eggs and nuts sounds like a shitty combination because a lot of the vegan stuff is nut-based.
I wish I didn't have this giant penis.
Well spit it out
I'm constantly tripping over mine
Executive function.
An inner voice. My wife and son both talk about options and choices like they've discussed things with another person.
I have to go with plan A. There is no second thought.
Total aphantasia? Same here, but:
No intrusive thoughts, ever.
No visions of, or reliving, trauma.
No sad-memory sounds or tastes.
No facades, so no energy wasted.
And if you got the SDAM bonus, you can re-discover all your favorite books and movies like you never read or watched them before!
As someone with diagnosed anexity. Constant repetive intrusive thoughts and obsessive reliving of past trauma, I can't help but be a little jealous.
Apologies. I'm sure you have your own complementary problems to over come. I just can't help and admire the how green your grass looks
My husband is like you, and also wishes for the absolute silence of my mind. But you’re right about green grass - I wish I could visualize happy memories or even picture the people I love.
OMG. There's a name for it? I have ALL THAT OTHER STUFF!!!
I'm so happy you posted, I'm going deep dive tomorrow!
Buckle up. You’ll discover we have some great advantages, but you may feel cheated out of some abilities, too. You can DM me if you have questions.
I'm 63. I'm about as buckled as I'm gonna get.
Good relation with family
Holy fuck this.
My parents haven't seen their only grandchild in like 6 years and it seems like they couldn't care less.
Being able to eat gluten. So many things have wheat and thus gluten. Soy sauce? Check. Dumpling wrappers basically everywhere in Japan? Check (more flexible and easier to work that pure rice flour). Tons of sauces? Check. Salad dressings? Check (sometimes via soy sauce in Japan).
A measurable attention span.
Oh but it CAN be measured.
It is simply that value is too short for what you need it to be.
Wait, what were we talking about? /jk
Deleted by author
I feel like long attention spans would also help out in other facets of life.
An interest in dogs. I really dislike them as far as having to live with one which makes dating literally impossible. Using dating sites over the years I've seen probably 80%+ profiles mention loving dogs, needing dogs, stealing your dog, owning all the dogs, some profiles even *start* with "blah blah dog."
I hate that there's such an obsession with dogs and travel... :(
Do you like cats? Or any other animals?
I love cats! I have a monkey kitty of my own, I've just never been fond of dogs unfortunately.
Oh, you will have no problem finding an amazing person at some point in time then. Cats are better anyway ;)
Me and my GF met online and we're both crazy cat people (our sons are two beautiful furry brothers). Just show that you're a cat person instead! Hope you find what you're looking for.
There are quite enough cat ladies and boys.
I for one like both but have a 60% tendency to get a dog first.
Kitty
Every cat is kitty! :)
The desire to have sex? Sure would make relationships easier.
I understand this well. Spent a few decades in dysfunctional relationships rooted in my lack of sexual desire. Happily married to another ace woman today, where sex is only ever suggested as part of joke and we've never even came close. She is liberating, freeing, incredible and safe.
Yet I still hold a lot of guilt from previous partners who spent time thinking something was wrong with them or I was cheating because I always made "not tonight" excuses for several years straight. It wasn't fair to either of us, but my lack of introspection, self-honesty and fear of being alone kept us years of strife.
Things are wonderful now, no complaints but *GAWD* a lot of heart ache could've been avoided if I had a *normal" sex drive.
Congratulations 👏. Can I ask, how you view nudity and you and/or your partner being naked in front of each other? Genuinely curious!
While we don't make a habit of it, both of us walk in front of the other when getting out of the shower or getting dressed for the day. It's just a part of life, nothing sexual about it. We've also given various small compliments about each other, generally after one of us gets a tattoo, but we have both discussed than anything about each other genitals is just weird and unwanted. We really are the greatest for each other. 😂
Having said that, she asked me to post a picture of her breasts a lil while ago, in my post history, but that's the most sexual thing either of us have suggested. And it was just taking a few photos than a movie, not like past GFs that wanted to turn that in to sex.
Now I'm curious myself, is nudity a hurdle for you? Fully valid and no judgement, just wondering. :)
Thanks for your story. I find it very interesting! This is just something I wondered about, whether it would be aversion or just a disinterest. I don't know many ace/aro people that well to ask.
No, I am neither and am in a relationship that involves it all. We are very comfortable with each other haha.
Glad you found your other half.
I'm ace in a demi relationship, but I'm NGL, it's still hard. I'm suuuuper glad sex isn't the focus of our relationship and we've been going strong for a while, but it does also add complexity
I'm aro/ace and sometimes I feel like this. But I guess what I want is just another person to have a connection with. If more people were aro/ace my problem would also be solved. Still I do sometimes wonder what I'm missing out on. Everyone seems to like it, yet I find it yucky. There's plenty of other things in life to enjoy though, so no biggie
In my case, I just feel like it’s unfair to my girlfriend. I know it’s not my fault, and I’m not obligated to give her something I don’t enjoy myself - but the reality is that something that’s a big part of most relationships is missing from ours, and it’s because of me. We’re in an open relationship, so she doesn’t have to go entirely without, but it’s still not ideal.
Hmmm yeah that sucks. In that regard we aro/aces have it easier I guess. For most people romance and sexuality seem to be tied. I can imagine that it often can lead to incompatibility
Eat dairy products
Paying the price for that today myself. Ate a big ass bowl of cereal last night while sleep walking. My sleeping self didn't know to take lactaid... 🤢
Man here I thought I had it bad when I ended up waking up on the couch and a brand new bag of barbeque chips was gone.
sleepwalking me needs to stop pigging out.
Try eating cereal with Fairlife instead. Tastes almost the same as milk with no side effects. I didn't know how much I missed cereal in milk until I had it
But why? The dairy industry does some truly evil shit.
Saaame. A sip of milk is like poison for me, 20 minutes later and I'm stuck in the bathroom for the next 4 hours.
I have minor lactose intolerance, and I drink coffee regularly.
I shit out diarrhea if I mix it with milk with lactose of any kind.
I was at a wedding tonight and everyone on the dance floor seemed to know what to do with their hands while dancing. I just can't seem to figure it out.
Two things, I have horrible vision, wear -9 glasses. And I am autistic and have a very difficult time navigating many social interactions, I would love to not have to deal with either of these.
I wish I had enough rhythm to dance, not like some amazing dancer, I'm talking even just a little bit. I dance like Elaine on Seinfeld.
Deleted by author
That's very impressive! We had a swing dance club in my high school and they always looked like they were having a good time. I think the closest thing I've done to dancing is marching in formation in the Army, which does take rhythm and coordination. But there's a certain "fluidness" to some people that my body just doesn't have.
Deleted by author
That's a good way to put it, I can definitely keep time. But yes, practice makes perfect!
I was terrible at swing! I can't lead in dancing. I can run a bunch of troopies to set up some comms in the bush and no one will ever hear me as us kids were raised "dad works night shifts so be quiet" kind of quiet. But if a game plan while dancing is a learned skill, I never hit proficiency at it and I think it's just not for me.
Well done, you. You learned a skill I can only envy, and in under a year!
Hair
Deleted by author
I feel like long hair would also help out in other facets of life.
I'd settle for a non-shy bladder (a social bladder? An extroverted bladder?)
I'll trade you! I have to pee about every 20 minutes due to malnurishment as a kid.
Functional parents.
Mine are 80, and due to a lifetime of terrible decisions and this shitty country, are driving for DoorDash, in the car I "loaned" to them a year ago.
I love them, but it'll be nice when the funeral comes, because at least it'll be the last time they use me as an ATM.
I'm here with you. I've spent the last two years no contact with mine and undoing the damage they caused to me and my kid. The worst part is, they weren't always like this and I'll have to mourn the death of who they were long before I mourn the death of who they are.
I've actually used almost this same exact phrase with one of my siblings who is also one of the "dependable ones". The versions of my mom and dad I loved the most are long dead already.
A properly functioning neocortex.
Regular fucking eyesight
I'm not even asking for 20/20, I'm asking for eyesight that can be fixed by LASIK
Stereo vision
Handwriting or drawing ability beyond that of a 6yo
The ability to follow a conversation with more than about 4 people in the room, and for crowd noise not to flip into a gibbering hellscape.
The ability to snap my fingers. I can barely make a sound when doing it.
Deleted by author
I feel like long fingers would also help out in other facets of life.
Can confirm, got long fingers, can reach the bottom of most jars.
Make an OK symbol with your middle finger
Move every finger except your index finger to your palm as close to your wrist as possible (in a comfortable manner)
Adjust your thumb so it is on the edge of your middle finger closer to your pinkie (this is to cause more friction between your middle finger and thumb)
Press down with your middle finger and then move your thumb, as quickly as possible, to around where your index finger is
If it works, it'll cause some burning on your finger and a loud noise, you can massage your palm where the middle finger hits if it's still muffled, it's likely stiff.
I definitely misread this and thought you said to put my index on my palm, so I was doing it that way, resting my thumb in my index finger. Definitely not as good as the actual method. Absolutely needs practice, though. Thanks for the help.
Which finger do you use other than your thumb? I use my rong finger, but I've seen others that use the middle. I'm sure some wierdo is out there mastering the pointer thumb technique
Middle. I've never heard of people using any other fiber, so it's what I use.
Smooth joints, by the time I was 14 I already had clicky joints and now if I stand or sit in the wrong way I need to click them back in
My ankles, wrists, fingers and hips pop so loud the secret police would hear it from down the road and bust me in the attic
A functional pancreas. Worked perfectly fine for 27 years, then my body just decided it was evil. Super neat.
A half-decent singing voice.
To illustrate how bad my singing is: our school did a musical every year. One year it was Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. The music department set up auditions. First they did a speaking audition, after which I was short-listed for Joseph. Then they did the singing audition. I ended up being 'one of the brothers, the one who doesn't really sing anything'.
I don't even want to be an awesome singer, just be able to carry a tune recognisably.
Practice. A lot.
In my teens I wasn't able to carry a tune at all. Our music teacher marked me as "hopeless" after hearing a me singing a few lines.
This pissed me off royally. I had no desire or illusions of becoming a great singer, but I would not accept being "hopeless". So I started practicing with simple children's song melodies and recorded my singing with an old cassette recorder. It was indeed pretty awful at first, but I slowly got better. Then I got my driver's license and could sing along the songs from the radio and my cassettes while driving alone, it was a big step up from singing quietly in my room.
I also started playing the guitar to get a better understanding of musical theory, which was helpful. After I had learned the basics of playing rhythm guitar firmly I learned to play the piano. I believe that singing the melodies while playing them on the piano was essential to my development, since I could instantly hear if I did not hit the correct note.
By my mid-twenties I could already carry tunes easily and even got a complements about my singing voice. Key changes and modulations were still pretty challenging, but I kept on practising whenever I found the time.
Now in my forties I can repeat a melody correctly after hearing it once or twice and I consider myself a decent singer. I don't sing karaoke or any solo performances, but I do love singing backup or as part of a group.
If my music teacher hadn't embarrassed me publicly all those years ago, I most likely would have never put any effort in getting better at singing or learning to play instruments. I started this lifelong project purely out of spite, but it became a major and very dear part of my life. I even owe my marriage to music, while we were still dating my wife confessed to me that she most likely wouldn't have even noticed me if I hadn't been playing the guitar at that one summer party. Thankfully I wasn't too hammered at that time ;)
Please, I don't want my neighbors to kill themselves.
Singing is 10% talent and 90% practice.\
You do you, of course, you don't, 't have to sing. But if you do it you will get better at it.
That is the reason I practiced the first two years in my room at lullaby volume.
Hmm, perhaps this is the key. I sing a lot, in the car, or the shower, or when no-one is around, so I get practice in but I don't (can't) hear what I'm singing properly.
It would not hurt to try. Using your phone to record your singing may not be the best idea, the microphone is so small that singing even with normal volume gets the recording easily distorted.
USB-connected microphones are pretty cheap and will perform much better, just hook one to a laptop and use any simple recording software.
And I recommend starting small with children's songs. "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" with it's straightforward ascending and descending melody is a great starter, or at least for me it was.
A big fluffy tail.
Moderately good health.
Slightly thicker wrists. Skinny wrists ruin the aesthetics of my arms.
Needlewrist Ned checking in
Wish I could whistle but I guess I just gotta practice. Also my friends can do that thing where you can move your pectorals but I can't do that
Deleted by author
I feel like long lips would also help out in other facets of life.
Do you go to the gym, or do pushups frequently? If you do, you should manage to do that thing with the pectorals after a while
I got a buff af friend who's trying to be a body builder, he's not able to do it
Being an actual person where everything I do isn't too fancy, wannabe grown, picky, spoiled, or out of my league. I want to wear fun clothes and makeup without everyone gawking at *it* for trying too hard to look like a real person, or everyone angry that *it* has nice things it doesn't deserve. And probably the ability to enjoy music since I lost that after every single genre I enjoyed was either below society or trying too hard to be More Than.
People are useless stupid cunts
Maschendrahtzaun Maschendrahtzaun :(
Private jet?
I don't think that's relatively minor to most
Public transport would count for USians, maybe cheap flights for Asians
Pleeeeeeaaasse. It's just one tiny little private jet and maybe one little tiny pilot to fly me. I hate traveling by air so much. What could be less minor? I think you should reconsider.
you can get private flights to anywhere legal for about 40k dollars
Almost worth it. I spent 20 hours getting home (Florida) from Canada, 36 hours getting home from Tennessee and 15 hours getting home from Colorado. I'm finding more and more that the airlines have little value-add and that doesn't even include the nightmare that is the TSA .